


ten thousand ways to lose

by BlackBlood1872



Category: King Falls AM (Podcast)
Genre: Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Post-Episode: E089 Late Fees
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-02
Updated: 2019-07-02
Packaged: 2020-06-02 16:17:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19445053
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlackBlood1872/pseuds/BlackBlood1872
Summary: In the wake of a call from Debbie, the boys try to catch their breath





	ten thousand ways to lose

**Author's Note:**

> Obligatory reaction fic to episode 89 bc it hurt me and I'm in pain.  
> Just—this _GD episode, man_. I can’t—just—this— _AAAAAA_. I don’t even have words to describe what this episode has done to me. My soul hurts
> 
> Title from Powerless by Linkin Park

It’s the first time Sammy’s really said his name since… Since. He’s been getting better at it, lately, been able to talk about him, but something about his _full name_ … it was different. More powerful.

And still just as fucking _useless_.

“I don’t know anyone named that,” she’d said, she’d _lied_ , cause Sammy knew she’d said it before—she’d lured Mike away with it, taunted Lily and everyone else who listened to that _damn_ podcast episode and _knew_ what it meant. She knew who he was asking about—but that was just it, wasn’t it? He was asking, he was _desperate_ , and she knew. And she knew he’d do anything to make her tell him _something_.

He’s shaking. They’re _both_ shaking, Ben almost vibrating in his seat, tears running down his face as he frantically types on his phone. Emily had dropped the call after getting out of the building, had to free up the line to call the fire department, and others after that. There’s nothing Ben could say against that, so he’s left to wait with frayed nerves until she can respond.

And Sammy—yeah, he’s terrified after being the middle man for that disaster, but also—the thought of Jack, of what she implied was happening to him, to everyone in _that place_ —his heart pounds in his ears and he can’t seem to draw in a full breath. He can’t—he doesn’t—he can’t _believe_ anything she says. Can’t handle the thought that the longer Jack’s lost in _there_ , the more he’s _hurting_ ; the more Sammy’s failure to do _anything_ to _help_ is _hurting him_ —he can’t.

They’re sitting in dead air, their emergency commercial long since ended, but Sammy can’t find his voice to speak up, to try and continue the show like everything’s _normal_ and _fine_ and like his heart isn’t tearing itself to shreds in his chest. Ben isn’t trying much either, staring fast at his phone and chewing his nails down to the quick, muttering increasingly panicked pleas.

Watching him work himself into a panic, Sammy’s heart hurts for a new reason. “Ben—” he tries, and his voice comes out like a croak, rough in his throat. He tries again, “Ben, it’s gonna be okay. She got out, she’s fine, something like this isn’t gonna—”

“But what if she—” Ben blurts in a burst, then bites his lip hard enough to hurt. “She sounded so—Sammy I don’t know if I can—and she’s not responding to my texts, it can’t take this long to call everyone she has to—” his words cut off as his breathing increases, quickly escalating into hyperventilating territory. Sammy reaches over the table and grabs his hand in a bruising grip. Ben squeezes back and closes his eyes, curling over the table as he tries to breathe. “She was so _scared_ ,” he whispers, strained and so close to broken.

Sammy can only hold his hand tighter, and he feels utterly powerless. Just like he always is.


End file.
